Saturday, January 13, 2024

The Troubling Case Of Can't Convict

 3 days into the future

Somewhere in Belgium in a deep, dank dungeon prison cell.

The sound of a power drill can be heard torquing the last bolt onto the iron mask that is covering the prisoner's face.

The prisoner is strapped to a chair. There are three helmeted men with face masks standing around him.

"You can't do this," says the man in the iron mask, his voice shaking in terror, "It's illegal. I could die, here."

"That's the point," said the man handling the drill to another man, "Except, there is no could. You will die here."

"But that's, that's...stop. Please, stop. I can pay you."

"We've heard that line before," said the man now holding the drill. "You'd stiff us just like you stiffed everyone else."

The third man raises his visor showing the man in the iron mask exactly who he is.

Shock comes into the eyes of the man in the iron mask.

"Dad sends his greetings. Don't worry. You're old. What ya got? If you're lucky, 2-3 years? Your accomplices are all dead. Shot in the head. You're the lucky one."



Six weeks and two days later.

At The White House press conference. 

"Mr. Mr. President. What about Donald Trump?"

"Donald Trump," begins the President, "Declared himself not a flight risk and disappeared from Mar-a-Largo 6 weeks ago."

"Mr. President!"

The President raises his hand, "Having missed his court dates, We- The United States of America- consider Mr. Trump a wanted fugitive. He is the leader of a terrorist organization that tried, tried to take over the United States government on January 6th."

"He is considered to be a dangerous threat to our government. And, we intend to find him."

Hands raise. The President points to one. "Mr. President, his allies claim that since The Supreme Court ruled that a president can not be held accountable for eliminating a political rival, that, Sir, Mr. President, that you've kidnapped him."

"You see, that's one of the reasons that my administration has always - Always- disagreed with that ruling. That it could be used against The United States."

"But, Mr. President, did you take him?"

"No! Emphatically no! In fact, it could be equally assumed that Mr. Trump went onto hiding just so I could be accused of this very thing."

The President holds up his hand, "My administration - The United States government- denies all- and I mean all- claims that we would have any knowledge of where Mr. Trump is. But, we will find him. And we will hold him accountable."

"Couldn't only an elite team like Seal Team 6 had taken him from Mar-a-Largo?"

"Look, a while back a Chinese fella just waltzed right in there. It's more likely he left on his own accord."

FOX News: Wouldn't it just been easier for you to take him? I mean, according to The Supreme Court, you're totally allowed."

The President grabs the podium with both hands and leans forward, "Dang Darn it, man, We disagree with that law. It's not American. I am The President NOT a dictator. I will NEVER NEVER NEVER EVER do such a tragedy of American justice."

"Look! Look, he's more likely staying with some old friends. Perhaps, trading America's secrets for his freedom."

"Let's get this straight:  Trump is a wanted man. He ran. It's that simple. And we will get him. We will not rest until We find him and bring him to justice. We will try him and lock him up."

"Next question. "




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